2016

It's been a crazy year. Like, really crazy. Not good crazy, or bad crazy. Just crazy. I spent the good majority of this year investing in my job, which I thought was going to pay off because I would work there until the end of my college career. But there were a lot of small reasons that added up to me deciding that it was time to quit. Basically I just felt that it was time. There was too much going on in my personal life along with my job life and it just got overwhelming. I couldn't breathe, really.
If you take apart the smaller reasons of why I quit, it doesn't seem like enough to actually quit. I mean, I went to a conference, I did reading, I invested in this job. I liked being an assistant manager and all that went with it. My boss wasn't mean and neither were my workers. They were really good friends that made me happy and laugh. I liked the work. All of the smaller reasons though just kept piling up and made me have to say goodbye.
And it was one of the hardest decisions I had to make. But it was something that I realize was important, and one that actually could have been made earlier. The job was good, but there will be other good jobs out there that work with my personal life too. I learned so many valuable lessons that I won't forget. I learned that holding my tongue is very important-- what goes around comes around. I learned that speaking up is also very important. People aren't mind readers, and it's important to tell them what you need from them in order to prevent burning bridges.
So all of these things together, it was a bittersweet decision. Not the way I wanted it to end. I didn't think it would end this way, but it did. I miss the work, it was work that made me happy.

That being said, I'm finding joy in different places now. I am returning to my First Love and He is receiving me with open arms. I know wherever I end up or wherever I go, that God is going to be with me. He is the whole point-- my life isn't about the work that I do, but WHO I work for. I can work anywhere as long as God is honored in my life. And at my old job, it was a slow descent downward. I am now focusing with clearer eyes because the Lord has blessed me with sight. I know that my new job is going to be different. I will handle myself differently, because I am aware of the Lord's presence inside me. Life is about WHO you work for, not what work you actually get to do.

It was a painful decision. It was a healing decision. From glory to glory, I will press on to finding out new things about life and myself. I am not trapped to one job simply because I enjoy it. I can move on without fear of losing out. I can move on to learn new things with the One who knows and loves me completely. No one loved me like that at my job. My job wasn't what saved me. The Lord is my Savior. I will work for Him.

2016 was the beginning of the BEGINNING. There was no end. This is not the end. My decision to quit may not look good on paper, but it looks good to my Lord, and He is the only one that matters. 2016, you aren't finished yet. Brianna, you aren't finished yet.